She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
