that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
