we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize