Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Well I just put wine in my tea
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
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