what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
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