Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
