I can tuck mytits in my pants
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Randomize
