She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
