question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
