Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
