Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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