Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
