there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize