If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
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