So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
