didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
