Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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