i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
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