I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Holy shit dude........stairs
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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