awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
