That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I wish I only lived at night.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
