Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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