it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I want to have your abortion
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Randomize
