we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
