You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
