Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
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