please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
