I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Randomize
