Don't you send me to vm
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Randomize
