She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
