your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
