my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
