just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
