And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize