I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
