So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
