you didnt know i had herpes?
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
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