Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
