dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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