How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
