woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
This baby is an asshole
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
