Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
