It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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