Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
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