peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
