I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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