i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize