i think my mom watched the whole time
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
did you just send me my own nude
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
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