She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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