This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
third nipple confirmed
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
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