he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive