ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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