she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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